Kerry Stokes Discovers Cure For Coronavirus: Shit-Tonnes Of Money – The Shovel
In a stunning new finding, billionaire media mogul Kerry Stokes has discovered that having enormous amounts of wealth protects you from contracting COVID-19.Mr Stokes returned from a skiing holiday in Aspen this week and was able to avoid the quarantine restrictions enforced on ordinary Australians, with authorities concluding that a man with that much money couldn’t possibly contract the virus.
“It was incredible how easily it worked,” Mr Stokes said. “I’d been holidaying in one of the world’s worst coronavirus hotspots, so I thought I might be at risk. But then I thought, hang on a second, I’m massively wealthy, that makes gives me immunity! It was a wonderful discovery”.
Boomers & Millennials: never mind the kids, try finding a job when you’re over 50
Finding
a job isn’t just hard on the young. Brett Flower’s story shows how many
older qualified and experienced workers end up jobless once they turn
50. As part of our Boomers & Millennials series, this story shows how career struggles are not merely the upshot of age and government policy but of corporate and personal circumstance.
When his daily podcast addressed the topic of farting and the coronavirus last Friday the world’s media found it irresistible, with some failing to catch the tongue-in-cheek tone of Swan’s original remarks, when he said a fart could spread the virus because it was aerosolised and that we should ban “bare-bottom farting”.
“Luckily, we wear a mask, which covers our farts all the time,” Swan said referring to the fact we usually wear pants when around other people. The Late Show with Steven Colbert
The World is listening to the ABC and the Government cuts and cuts it's budget
The ABC’s health editor, Norman Swan, is not just ubiquitous in Australia, he’s gone global.When his daily podcast addressed the topic of farting and the coronavirus last Friday the world’s media found it irresistible, with some failing to catch the tongue-in-cheek tone of Swan’s original remarks, when he said a fart could spread the virus because it was aerosolised and that we should ban “bare-bottom farting”.
“Luckily, we wear a mask, which covers our farts all the time,” Swan said referring to the fact we usually wear pants when around other people. The Late Show with Steven Colbert
ABC coronavirus podcast becomes the fart that was heard around the world
FAKE NEWS
MCCRANN: USING DUD MODELS TO UNLEASH THE BULLIES
Terry McCrann on the new tyranny of virus experts: "Our
elected leaders and accompanying self-defined 'experts' have seized with
relish and gusto the responsibility — more accurately, the opportunity —
to release the inner authoritarian; to rule over us, effectively by
fiat, like some medieval monarch surrounded by acolytes and activists."
VIRUS TYRANNY: WE'VE BEEN TURNED INTO THE RULED
The virus panic has created an authoritarian state which
divides us into the rulers and the ruled - and politicians seem
unwilling to surrender their new power. Brendan O'Neill: "We’ve been
forced out of the public realm, atomised, reduced to spectators watching
experts decide when we’ll be allowed out again." UPDATE: A petition
demanding an end.
Singapore thought they were beating coronavirus. But they had a blind spot
- While Singapore was being praised for its meticulous coronavirus containment strategies, some argued that initial measures failed to address a key area that has now led to a spike in cases. Here's what happened.
FAKE
VIRUS CRAZY: 96-YEAR-OLD DIES, BUT POLICE CHASE SWIMMERS
The latest dead: "A 96-year-old woman at the Newmarch House
aged care facility." Yet the virus police meanwhile chase the young and
healthy: "Police were forced to close fences and move people off
Coogee, Clovelly and Maroubra beaches." No, they weren't "forced" to do
something so useless.
How many young and healthy people is Bolt hugging these days? Is he encouraging James and Dom to get out and party with their friends? What about his daughter? Is he inviting them all to party at his place? Nobody laughs at god in a hospital, not even Bolt. But here he is telling you the rate of spread has stopped it all under control. Rest assured it's bullshit and he isn't encouraging his children to be reckless and he wouldn't be complaining that the police closed StKilda down if they were on the beach with strangers.
The police aren't encroaching on the rights of the reckless they are protecting the rights of the majority not to be afflicted by a yet unknown contagion that has the capacity to spread faster than the Spanish flu with as yet unknown long term consequences. Let Bolt catch the virus be a volunteer show us the first-person experience. Be a spokesman like Derryn Hinch was on the matter of child molesters when he stood up for what he believed. He gained respect Bolt certainly doesn't practice what he preaches others do.
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